The Wasteland by Takako Takahashi

Author:Takako Takahashi [Takahashi, Takako]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Cornell University East Asia Program
Published: 2019-04-14T17:00:00+00:00

13

264-4343. THAT WAS THE NUMBER TAKEDA SACHIKO DIALED.

“Hello?” came the voice at the other end.

“This is LifeLine, isn’t it,” said Sachiko with a sigh of relief, for it was a man’s voice.

“I’m the person who called before,” she began. “I’m the person who said I’m so cold, terribly cold and there’s nothing that can be done about it so I want to die. Actually, I phoned yesterday too. But because I got a woman, somehow or other I just couldn’t talk about my problems very well. I told her it was easier for me to talk to a man, and so the woman—she wasn’t put out at all—was kind enough to tell me that if I called today, a man would answer. I was surprised she wasn’t offended. Well, since she was a woman, you know, I thought for sure she would take offense. Are you the person I talked with the last time? I can’t see your face, so I can’t tell. And I think your voice also seems different from the voice last time. Anyway, whoever it is that’s okay with me. Just so long as it is someone kind enough to listen.”

“If a person prefers to speak with a man, then a man will take the call, and if the person prefers to speak with a woman, then a woman will take the call. Because the important thing is to meet the needs of the caller. But whether it’s a man or woman who takes the call, both will equally listen to what you have to say.”

“Yes, I understand that. My father died when I was just a child, so I hardly knew him. When it’s a man’s voice I guess it makes me think of the father I never knew. When it’s a woman’s voice I just think of the unpleasant voices of the many women I’ve known. And so I just get to where I can’t talk. I suppose that’s not right, huh? I suppose that’s selfishness on my part.”

“No, no,” replied the voice, full of kindness.

“Well then, it’s okay?” Hearing his voice, Sachiko could feel herself softening.

“So then, you must have met with another painful experience.”

The question struck her at the very core.

“Another painful experience? No, it’s not just that. It’s always, always a painful experience.”

By this point in their phone conversation, Sachiko realized just how enormous the thing was that she had bottled up within herself.

“I see. Let’s talk about it, then. Not just one person considering it, but the two of us considering it together. If we do it that way, something may come to us.”

The voice was kind, yet at the same time firm.

“I’m fourteen years old and in second year of junior high school.”

Sachiko repeated what she had said on the previous occasion, for it was not at all clear to her that the person she was talking to was the same as the person before. Indeed, the voice had become abstracted: it was unquestionably a male voice, but it was stripped down to the basic characteristics of maleness.

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